Tag: Vins

Puberty

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Vins is 11 now and starts middle school in August. How that happened so fast, I don’t know!

Anyway, two weeks ago they had their ‘puberty talk’ in school. Boys and girls are separated, and given ‘the talk’.

When I got home that afternoon I asked him how it went. He said it was very uncomfortable. I asked him if he had any questions he wanted to ask me or LagosDad, he mumbled ‘no’. Basically, he didn’t want to talk about it anymore.

The following week I was talk to a friend. Her son is the same grade as Vin and also had ‘the talk’. She told me about her chat with him that day. They asked him what he had learnt. He mentioned a couple of things and said ‘sex’. They asked him ‘what did you learn about sex?’ I can’t remember what she said he answered, but he did say this:

“Do you know what Vinay said? Vinay said: ‘Now I know why my parents spent the weekend at Eko Hotel!'”

Hahahahaha! Oops? I mean, it was our anniversary…?

What’s in the UK?

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We are watching X Factor, which I love. Unfortunately we are a few weeks behind the UK, but we (Vins and I) watch it quite religiously.

So right now, we are watching and Vins sees an X Factor app being advertised and wants to download it. The following conversation ensued…

Vins: We should download the app, mama.

Me: It won’t work here because we’re not in the UK. Do you know what the UK is?

Vins: Yes. 

Me: What’s in the UK?

Vins: Amazon!

Lunch With My Bros

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Last week I told Vins that I wanted to take him and some of his friends out for lunch during Easter break. I carry around a lot of guilt when it comes to his social life. I don’t make as much effort as some mums make when it comes to arranging playdates and having his friends over to our place. We just kind of wait until he’s invited somewhere. This is not good, I know. And I need to step up my game a bit.

Anyway, so as I was telling him about the lunch thing and he stopped me mid-sentence. The following conversation ensued:

Vins: Mama, mama – wait. Just wait. On Wednesday X has invited me for a bros lunch.

Me (unsure if I heard correctly): Oh. What’s a bros lunch?

Vins: You know! A bros lunch!

Me (trying not to laugh): Vins, I don’t know what a bros lunch is!

Vins (getting impatient): Mama – you know we’re all best friends, right? Well, this is lunch with all the best friends together!

Me: Ohhhhhhh. Okay, that sounds good!

Seriously – where does he learn this stuff?

Gone Again

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I was looking for a post I wrote about 18 months ago. A post about the children’s nanny and the fact that she was away/had been away for about 6 months…

Anyway, so that time has come again. Annual leave time.

E (the children’s nanny) left yesterday for a month.

It all happened rather suddenly. She wasn’t meant to go until the summer, but something came up and she had to leave this month. While I spent the last two weeks worrying about the children and how they’d cope, worrying about how I’d cope and worrying about who would do the laundry (I suppose I’ll have to be a bit proactive!), I realized that this was actually a good thing. At least I can have a summer holiday too, then!

Anyway, so the post I was looking for had to do with Vins’ bedtime and the fact that I had to pat him and sing him to sleep. Not sure if you remember that one?

So last night, when it was bedtime he asked me to put him to bed. I said, “Of course I’ll put you to bed!” I thought, “ARGH!”

I tucked him in, he closed his eyes immediately. I patted him for a few minutes, but didn’t sing. It looked like he was asleep, so I stopped the patting and studied his face (in the dark), hoping he didn’t suddenly sit up and ask to sleep in my bed. After about a minute, he opened his eyes, looked at me and said, “You can go now.”

So the time has come. The time when he doesn’t need me (or anyone else) to sing Dream A Little Dream to him. And he doesn’t need to be patted to sleep (finally). He even stayed in his own bed (until 4.45am).

He’s really growing up, isn’t he?

Lovebirds 

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So this morning, Vins walked in on LagosDad and I, ummm, being “intimate”. Oops.

Anyway, he looked at us, rolled his eyes and said, “Lovebirds!”

Then he grabbed LagosDad’s phone and left.

Where does he learn this stuff?!

You’re a Strong Boy!

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My kids have been sick.

One day it’s one and two days later, it’s the other. This has been going on for about a month. I’m pretty sure there’s something in the air.

Anyway, yesterday, Vins was complaining about a headache. He has NEVER complained about headaches before. He threw up a few times. He whinged and he whined and I started worrying about malaria, as he’s been getting fevers on and off for a couple of weeks.

Finally, he told me that he wanted to go to the doctor. “Mama, please take me to the doctor. I just want to get well now.” Vins wanting to go to the doctor? That’s when I knew he really wasn’t feeling good and was probably in more pain than I realized.

He threw up on the way to the doctor. And was pretty upset that his clothes were wet and dirty, and he started crying. My FIL kept telling him not to cry as he was a strong boy and that he should be brave.

This did not go down well with me – but I couldn’t say anything to him (directly, at least). The only thing I could do was tell Vins (in front of my FIL) that if his head hurt and he wanted to cry – he should cry. If something else hurt so much that he wanted to cry, then he should cry.

I will not have my son growing up thinking that in order to be a strong boy, or to be a man, he can’t cry. That is complete and utter nonsense and I won’t accept it. The boy is only five, for God’s sake.

He is who he is and I won’t change that. For anyone.

P.S. He has a tummy bug, not malaria.

(Almost) Time for a Holiday

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I’m so knackered.

I wake up and count how many hours there are until I can go back to sleep again! And, I’ll have you know, that afternoon naps are a thing of the past (unfortunately).

At least Easter Break is happening from next Thursday – Hurrah! And I’m going to Dubai – Hurrah! Without children and LagosDad – Hurrah (kind of)!

Let me give you some back story on this…

So… one of my BFFs (H) has a big milestone birthday coming up at the end of May and she’s been talking about getting away for a girly weekend to celebrate. I can’t get away in May and she didn’t want to take time off work, so we decided to go over Easter weekend.

The next step was deciding where to go – Zanzibar? Istanbul? London? Paris? We both knew we wanted to shop a bit lot. Eat a lot. Chill a bit. We knew it was only for about four days, so nowhere too far away. Where would be best?

H decided on Dubai. Nooooo! How was I supposed to tell my parents that I was coming to Dubai for four days, not staying with them and not bringing their grandchildren? I tried to convince her to go to other places – but visas (expense of) were an issue and H just wasn’t having any of it. She had decided on Dubai. LagosDad, very sensibly, said that it was H’s birthday and that I had to go along with what she wanted!

I thought about taking the kids – leaving them with my parents for four days (with the nanny too) and then after H went back to Lagos, I’d move in with my parents. But it really wasn’t worth it. Easter break is only a week long and it was too much money to spend for four of us for only a week.

I thought about how to bring this up with my mum. As it turns out, I needn’t have worried so much because she wasn’t going to be there anyway! While I’m disappointed that I won’t see her, I won’t feel so guilty about not taking the children.

So, after all that, H and I leave next Thursday. S (another friend) will already be there and we’re going to spend four days in Dubai – shopping (first and foremost), eating (can’t wait to go to McDonalds), drinking excessively (maybe only on the first night, as we’re getting old now and our hangovers last about three days) and chilling (if we can tear ourselves away from the mall).

Do you think it’s strange that I’ve not mentioned my children or how I’m worried about leaving them and that I’ll miss them?

I will miss them. And I am a bit anxious about leaving them. But I REALLY need this break. And I know they will be well taken care of.

Vins has agreed to go to Easter Camp (he never ceases to amaze me) – so he’ll be busy every day. And Booni… Booni will have playdates.

See? We’re all good!

 

Behaviour

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I don’t know what it is – but Vins has really been playing up recently. It could be the lack of routine. It could be that he’s bored. It could be that he needs to be back in school. It could be that he’s at “that age”, or it could just be that he’s being an ass.

I’ve just given him a talking to about his behaviour, general lack of manners and respect for others. And I may have even threatened him with boarding school. I know – that was a terrible thing to do!

He was silent. He just stared at me. And then he left the room. I felt bad. He looked a bit shocked.

He came back a few minutes later, piece of paper in hand, and said…
“Mama, I’ve made you a behaviour chart. When you’re bad, I’ll give you a cross and when you’re good, I’ll give you a check.”

WTAF?

I stared at him dumbfounded. I didn’t know what to say to him!

Eventually, I said, “That’s fine. But what will we do about your behaviour?”

He shrugged and walked off.

Lord help me.

I Went and I’m Back

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So I went to Bali without LagosDad or the children. Vins wasn’t happy about it when I told him, but he was ok when I left.
It was so nice to be away and not have any responsibilities. But I really did miss them all. Also, there was no time to just chill! I got there on a Tuesday afternoon and all the wedding stuff started on the Friday morning and was non – stop until Sunday night. (You can see photos on Instagram  (@lagosmum) or #AnViLivedHappilyEverAfter)
During each flight I took, I thanked God that I decided not to take the kids. Eight hours from Lagos to Abu Dhabi. Eight hours from Abu Dhabi to Singapore and two and a half hours from Singapore to Bali. It was so… long. And uncomfortable! And a week later I did it again in reverse order. There was no way I’d have survived with the children. Nor would I have been able to watch all the movies that I did!
Anyway, so I’m back now. I got back on the 23rd. Vins was super clingy that day. And I was thrilled that Booni remembered me. He jumped straight into my arms and gave me lots of cuddles and kisses 🙂
I can’t believe that Christmas has come and gone as well!
Where is the time going?
I hope you’re all having a good time. Merry Christmas and happy new year!