Tag: siblings

One Month

LagosMum2 Comments

So, it’s been a month.  A month and two days since I’ve been a mum of two.

I’ve wanted to update my blog before, but I’ve not really had the time!

My mum arrived about three weeks before Baby V did and she’s still here.  She’s planning to leave next week, but I’m doing all that I can to keep her here for longer!

V2 is quite a good baby.  He feeds about every four hours.  We have good days and bad days.  And of course, good nights and bad nights.  There are nights he just won’t settle and there are others where he just passes out!

V1 has been… Ok.  That’s really the only word I can use to describe him. He’s fine with his brother. He helps me with choosing clothes and changing nappies (providing Octonauts isn’t on) and likes to feel needed.  But he has been acting out also.

While LagosDad was here, V1 was getting a lot of attention – they did a lot together.  Bus rides, Science Museum, etc.  LagosDad left on 11th September and V1 is really missing him. He wasn’t happy to start school. He wasn’t happy to go to the park. He wasn’t happy to do his Kumon, nothing.  He has given us all a very rough time. His whole attitude sucked.

He has made me so cross sometimes – but I have to just stop and remind myself… New country, new school, new environment, new sibling, no LagosDad, not as much time with Mama as before. And then I feel like a crap mum!

We’ve had a few visitors come by and see Baby V. During this time V would shout at anyone talking while he was watching TV (including the midwife and health visitor). He would also climb into my lap after I fed Baby V and ask me to burp him (gross) and stroke his hair.  Poor guy – it made me feel so guilty that I wasn’t spending enough time with him.

He’s kind of settled down now – he still has his moments, but he has become better.

 

He Knows

LagosMum8 Comments

So LagosDad and I sat V down yesterday morning and told him about the baby.  Well, I told him – LagosDad just sat there.

I had been dreading it.  I envisioned him lying down and beating his fists against the floor, kicking his legs and shouting, “Nooooo!” over and over again.

Here’s how it went.

Me: V – you know how mama’s back has been hurting?

V: Yes.

Me: You know how papa took me to the doctor on Wednesday?

V: Yes.

Me: Well, the doctor told me there was nothing wrong with my back.  And he didn’t know why my back was hurting.  So he said he had to do a blood test.  You’ve had a blood test, haven’t you?

V: Yes and I cried so much.  Did you cry?

Me: No, I didn’t.  It didn’t hurt at all.  Anyway, so we had to wait a little while, and then the doctor called papa and me back into his office.  He told me that there was nothing wrong with my back.  Then he asked me if I’ve been eating a lot.  I have been eating a lot, haven’t I?

V: *nods*

Me: Then he asked me if my tummy was getting bigger.  It is getting bigger, isn’t it?

V: Yes, it’s getting very big!

Me: Then he said there was a baby growing in my tummy!

*anxiously waits for reaction*

V: In how many months will it come out?

Oh

Me: In six months.

V: No, I want it to be in ten months.

Me: Ok – in ten months (he has no concept of time anyway).  Isn’t that exciting?  You’re going to have a baby brother or sister!  You’re going to be a big brother!  And you can help mama do so many things – like give the baby a bath, feed the baby and change yucky nappies!

V: Yes!  And you know.  When the double-decker bus bed your ordered for me in Bali comes (we didn’t order it in Bali, we are YET to order it), I’m going to give my cot to the baby that comes out of your tummy.  *taps my tummy*

Me: Oh V – you are going to be such a good big brother, aren’t you?

*starts crying*

*eye roll*

*blames hormones*

*big sigh of relief*

It’s Complicated

LagosMum6 Comments

LagosDad and I have been trying to figure out how to tell V that he’s going to have a younger sibling by the end of the summer.

But we are finding it a bit complicated.

I’ve tried testing the waters a little bit and have had a couple of “big brother” and “baby brother or sister” conversations.  I think we are in trouble.

This is how the last conversation went…

Oh – we were watching Charlie and Lola.

Me: Oh how nice! Isn’t Charlie such a good big brother? He always takes care of Lola. I think you would be a good big brother.

V: No.

Me: You know, many of your friends have little brothers and sisters.  And some of your friends have big brothers or sisters *gives examples*

V (after a slight pause): Where can we get one?

Me: Well, babies grow in their mama’s tummy.  So we would grow the baby in my tummy.

V: No.  No.  I’m the only baby allowed in your tummy!

Oh.  Crap.

My grandmother’s advice was to stop asking him if he’d like a baby brother or sister and to just tell him that he’s getting one!

Sounds like good advice to me.

All I know is we have to do it soon.  As in today.

We’ve got birthday parties for the next FOUR Saturdays – and we need to tell him before he hears it from someone else!

Any advice?