Fear

Over the years I’ve heard many stories of people being car-jacked, arm-robbed, harassed by police and sometimes even kidnapped for ransom.  While I’ve found all these stories shocking, I’ve never let it affect our day-to-day lives.

During these times, my parents and my in-laws have told us to stay in on Saturday nights.  And to come back early.  My response was always the same, ‘For how long?  We can’t do that forever.  We can’t put our whole lives on hold.’

After our incident last weekend, I was scared.  But to be honest, I think I got over it quite quickly.  I wasn’t afraid to go out on Sunday.  I wasn’t afraid to take Vinay to playgroup on Monday.  I was even ok taking him on all my errands on Tuesday.  I hadn’t forgotten about it.  But I wasn’t scared.

I know of people that have left the country for five or six weeks after they’ve been robbed.  I can understand it, but I didn’t feel the same way. 

And I know why.  It’s because nothing happened to us.  Nothing was taken from us.  Neither of us was hurt.  

On Wednesday afternoon, I started feeling very differently.  

We went to playgroup in the morning.  A friend who I was expecting to see there, didn’t show.  I messaged her when I got home.  The message didn’t deliver.  

We slowly started getting details.  First of all – they are all fine – no one was hurt.  That was the main thing.  

They (husband and wife) were coming home at about 11pm after having dinner out.  Their daughter (a couple of months younger than Vinay) was at home with her paternal grandparents.  Somehow…  They don’t know how it happened – they were followed home.  They were being extra cautious as they’d heard of what had happened to us at the weekend.  But still, they were followed home by four armed men.

Before entering their home, they had taken their phones, her handbag, watch and earrings.  

I don’t know how the husband was able to warn his parents, but his mum hid in the bathroom with their little girl.

They took some cash and they left.

They were lucky.  Very VERY lucky.

It’s one thing to be stopped on the road and *almost* be car-jacked at gun-point.  It’s quite another to have someone in your home, with their hands on you, taking your belongings.

My father-in-law told us that we shouldn’t have stopped at the lights on Saturday night.  He said we must NEVER stop at traffic lights on any night.

I later told LagosDad that he did absolutely the right thing.  

What if we were followed home and didn’t realise it?  

What if we had actually lead armed-robbers to our house and to our sleeping child?  I would never be able to forgive myself if anything happened to Vinay.

I wasn’t scared before, but I am now.

2 thoughts on “Fear

  1. Gosh hun, your own experience must have been frightening enough but to then hear what happened to your friends, it’s no wonder you’re frightened. Xx

  2. I used to work in the commodities world in a previous life and used to frequently interact with South Africans of Indian origin in Jo’burg and Durban. They were materially wealthy, but lived in constant fear like mention, and used to tell me horror stories about people being shot, robbed or even killed for no rhyme or reason, sometimes in their own bed while they slept. Fear is something that will remain with all the best gadgets, guns and protection that you can afford, (which some of them did), but can never shrug off very easily. You have to live each day to the fullest and look forward to the next was their usual response.Increasingly, many of them after handing their business holdings over to the next generation, were moving either to London, or increasingly to Dubai. When I asked why they left everything behind, their answer was "Why live in fear in the twilight years of our life when you have worked so hard to achieve so much, and have to constantly worry about being robbed for enjoying your wealth or lifestyle ?"

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